Thursday, March 5, 2009

The day my blog bit me in the face

Since the conception of this blog, I had hoped to keep it semi-anonymous. One reason for that was because I thought this would be some kind of free therapy for me, and for the most part it has been. Another reason for that is because there are a lot of creepy people out there and I didn't want anyone being able to trace me back to my home address. I'm not worried about me so much, although I am a little bit, I'm more worried about my kid.

At the same time, I promised myself that I wouldn't put anything out there that would intentionally embarrass my kid. So when I started writing stories about him, I let him know. Hey, I started a blog, I wrote this and that about you - I'm not asking you if you are cool with that, I'm just letting you know, k? For the most part, his response is that he is way too cool to see what his lame mother is doing on-line.

I have sent him a link to every story that mentioned him, and every time he has ignored me - which is fine with me. I'm not sending him the link because I need some kind of attention from my child, I'm sending it out of courtesy because I just called him a monkey, or something similar. I try to never ask him afterward if he read the post, I don't seek validation from my child. I have just assumed over the past few months that he ignores everything I send him...

The other night, Tuesday night dinner with my nieces, my sister Kouf and I were talking in the kitchen while the other savages were running rampant up and down the stairs and between the rooms on the bottom floor. My son came into the kitchen, the only male in a sea of women and girls, and was playing with the younger girls. When he came in, the vase on the fridge full of flowers vibrated, as did the plants in water on the baker's rack. Keep in mind that he is incredibly skinny, but towers over everyone in the family by at least six inches.

When I pointed this fact out to him, he thought it would be funny to jump up and down in the kitchen. I didn't. After this, my sister and I thought it might be funny to nickname him Big Foot or Sasquatch, or Sassy for short. He didn't.

What he did think would be funny would be calling me "farty four eyes". OMG - I didn't send you That link! OMG - You Read My Blog!

He still won't admit to it, but all I've been called for the past couple of days is farty-four-eyes by my child. Obviously I'm going to have to do something different in the future.

I'm becoming too over-exposed or something. Perhaps I need to create a new and totally anonymous blog where I can be as dark as I want and not worry about anything...

17 comments:

Scope said...

Ouch. You should threaten to tell his mother!

Morgan the Muse said...

Whew. The way you started out, I thought you saw some strange vehicle circling really slowly...

Fancy Schmancy said...

Scope, too funny! I know, I created this monster.

Morgan, no strange vehicles, yet - but I'm started to feel my worlds colliding between the blog and FaceBook!

Cora said...

You know, when I started my blog I thought about going totally anonymous too because I was concerned my ex-husband would find it and secretly watch it and freak out (he previously found me on ebay somehow and had been stalking me there to make sure I wasn't selling off anything he ever gave me. *shudder* Creepy) but then I figured if he could find me on ebay when I'm anonymous there, he could find my blog too whether it's anonymous or not, so I just thought screw it, and I went with my real name. Does he know yet? I really don't know. But he'll figure it out one day, and I actually kind of look forward to that day a little bit because I am dying to ask him why on earth he thinks this sort of stuff is any of his business in the first place.

Sass said...

Please don't call him Sassy.

Sassy doesn't tend to have big feet and tower over everyone else by 6 inches.

I'm just sayin'. ;)

Fancy Schmancy said...

Cora, I hope your ex decides to comment when he finds your blog so we can all tell him to crawl back under his rock where he belongs.

Sassy, sorry! I didn't mean you. But really, my kid is only 14 and wears and 11-1/2 wide shoe. And he's not done growing!

Candy's daily Dandy said...

HAHAHAAHA! Little s&%t! Unfortunately you are now doomed to be "farty four eyes" forever!

Anne's Friend said...

hahahah
pretty funny!

my blog is an anonymous one but I also have a regular one that friends and family read.

JoJo said...

Yowza!!! That's really funny, actually. You better hope and pray he doesn't call you that in front of any guy you might be interested in. This may call for some kind of pay off to keep him quiet.

Gwen said...

I like this kid. He's quick.

Fancy Schmancy said...

Gwen, you can have him...

MelO said...

LMAO!!! OH NOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Although... Fancy-I can't say I'm too surprised if you're sending the kid your LINKS! Lol!

If you DO start over... you better tell me where you're at, woman! XO

Dr Zibbs said...

See. Anonymous can be good. Except I do like seeing what people look like.

Aunt Becky said...

I just died a little bit. Too funny!

Fancy Schmancy said...

Let me serve as an example to anyone out there who have children - never let them know what you are up to on-line!

Angie said...

Hahaha...you poor thing! If you do go "fully anonymous", you have to let us know!

chaos37 said...

Actually I'm surprised you haven't since you got Outed...