Friday, October 24, 2008

My kid is pretty cool, sometimes

My son and a young lady started casually "dating" over the summer. I met her mother briefly once at a summer party. She and I email each other every once in a while, mostly about stuff to do with our kids. I was amused when she sent me a joke email that I thought was rather risque to send to someone you don't really know. Especially a fellow Catholic school mother. SHE doesn't know what a heathen I am.

My son let me know yesterday that he and the young lady had broken up. I talked to him about how he felt about it, and he actually talked back to me, which was pretty nice given that he's a 14 year old who has a hard time communicating his emotions. I also told him it was too bad because I really liked the young lady's mother. He said he was cool with it if I wanted to continue being friendly with her. As a matter of fact, he was probably more cool with it since they had broken up than he was when they were together. He felt pretty awkward when he found out the first time we had emailed each other.

Last night I got a new email from the mother:

"Very good video."

Oh yes, she did. Two weeks after I happily supported Connecticut legalizing civil unions for homosexuals.

I forwarded her email to my son with a note, "so there goes a potential friendship, right down the political tubes".

He emailed me back, "What, can't you be friends with a conservative?"

Out comes my lecture mode. It's right up there with my over-react mode, my always say the inappropriate thing at the wrong time mode, and my give way too much information mode.

"Of course I can be friends with a conservative. But I don't think I can be friends with someone who doesn't even for a second ask my political views or know anything about me before sending me messages about such highly charged issues such as pro-life and homosexuality and marriage and family.

I know that the way I have raised you with the Catholic religion as your base may make our beliefs differ from each other, sooner or later. I will never regret the education and moral basis and moral code that the Catholic school system has provided to you.

You and I may not always see eye to eye, as long as we agree to respect each other, and each other's opinions.

I am extremely pro-choice, have never been married and am a single mother. If you are still reading this, sweetie, know that my choice was to have you, even when others were advocating abortion. It was MY CHOICE, and I chose life. I have never had an abortion, I don't know that I could. But I wholeheartedly support a woman's right to choose what to do with her body, with her life, with her womb.

Anyone who knows me for a split second knows I wouldn't support a message that includes the term "Evangelical Christians". No matter how many flavors you put in the Kool-aid.*

I love you,


p.s. file this under way too heavy of a response for a flippant reply"

*note to Zibbs, I wrote this email last night, before I saw your Kool-aid post today. Coincidence? Or is it something in the water?

I just watched the video again. Since last night, it looks as though the link has been edited. There are now 2 versions floating around, the second is less inflammatory. I found the original on YouTube.

I love the part about protecting sacred life from conception to "natural death". When the Christian George W. Bush was the governor of Texas, didn't that state carry out the death penalty more than any other state ever? Also the part about America being built on Judeo Christian values. While that may be partly true, wasn't the country also founded by people from many different cultures looking to escape religious persecution? Weren't many of the original colonists Puritans and Quakers? And isn't it in the Constitution that all men are created equal? Add the Civil Rights Amendment, in which all men, being created equal, should be extended the same rights and liberties - shouldn't that mean even the men that want to marry each other?

This was the reply waiting for me when I got to work this morning, "Bah, you know I'm not Conservative. Highly from it. I agree with mainly all your political beliefs, except for swearing at the tv when Republicans are on. And she just assumed that since you were sending me to *name of Catholic school removed* that you were probably some sect of Christianity and held the same beliefs as her."

Do you see what he did there? In a few sentences he not only talked me down, but sympathized with me while trying to be fair to the other party. This kid is wise beyond his years. Maybe HE should go into politics.
Although he'll never get far when they start researching his crazy family.

If you are a Christian, an Evangelical Christian, or a Republican, please know that I respect you and your opinions. I hope you will do the same for me. It is, after all, still a free country.


kate said...

Yep, he's a pretty cool kid. Can't imagine where he gets it. ;)

As for the video, I will never understand how it is threatening to "family values" to allow a couple, ANY couple, to commit to each other in marriage.

Vodka Mom said...

oh NO SHE DIDN'T! omg. I respect you so much more after reading that post. Not that I DIDN'T respect you before, mind you!!!

Dr Zibbs said...

Yeah I'm pro choice too.

Memarie Lane said...

i'm a floater myself, can never figure out what to believe. and it drives me nuts when anyone sends me anything that's either overly conservative or overly liberal, especially if they haven't checked their facts.

JoJo said...

You have yourself quite a young man there, Fancy. You should be proud of yourself and him.

But I started watching that vid and threw up in my throat a little. lol As one who just attended a gay wedding, and over 20 yrs ago took a frightened, pregnant friend to a clinic, I made it about 45 seconds in and had to stop.

MelO said...

Very moving post, Fancy! I can't even watch this yet (I'm at work, although I do work with a bunch of conservative republicans, so maybe I could bend the rules for this one? Lol... I digress) but I can imagine how drastic it must have been!

Your son... lol... really DOES have a good point about the whole Catholic school bit.

But admitedly, I would be fuming as well. I just can't understand that perspective. Yes, everyone is allowed to have their own opinions, but it doesn't mean I have to understand it. I'm with you... but way to go on raising a VERY FINE young man!

Fancy Schmancy said...

Thanks for the comments on my son. I'm pretty proud of the way he thinks and that he is evolving into an independent, fair, generous and kind man. Which I like to think I had a little something to do with, altho my moms thinks I just got lucky ;)

小貓咪 said...